Hello
It feels so good to finally have the opportunity to place an entry in my journal, but I do have something to say about that.
You know this journal is not meant to be the end all be all of us. This is like an appetizer. I felt (I won't say you, its what I felt) were experiencing some feelings of rejection and dissapointment because I had not placed an entry for several days. I felt you began to talk in a defeated manner. I felt you thought that without this journal everyday that there was no relationship. While this may be a comfort to you daily, it is not the relationship. We had something before this journal and we will have something after this journal. I felt that you were thinking it was over or something. I told you I had a computer virus. We were on Thanksgiving Break and I didn't have access to a computer. I won't be able to have it removed until Friday, if then, Dell wants to charge me 99.00 to have them help me remove it. I may have to wait two more weeks because I don't have that kind of money available right now for that expenditure. You know the problems I have been having lately. My days are very challenging. I am disappointed to think that you had just given up because of four or five days of no journal entries. I felt your demeanor and the things you said and did indicated that you were ready to give up. What happen to all that talk about "I wouldn't walk away" "I'm in it for the long haul" "I won't let you walk away"
This is just an external piece of equipment. This is not the relationship. I refuse to let the devil think he has won. The devil has been messing with every aspect of my life lately and I just keep getting up. I refuse to let this be the end of us just because you don't have a journal entry every morning at 6 am! I'm worth more than that and if you feel that you need to hear I love you every morning to know that I'm still here, then here you go:
I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU
I GAVE YOU TWO WEEKS OF I LOVE YOUS. ONE EXTRA INCASE IT TAKES LONGER TO FIX THE COMPUTER. I AM ABLE TO USE MY COMPUTER AT WORK, SOMETIMES I WILL BE ABLE TO GO TO THE LIBRARY AND MAYBE USE A COMPUTER BUT IF NOT THEN DON'T SIT AROUND THINKING SAD THOUGHTS. KNOW I LOVE YOU AND KEEP ON GOING. WE WILL NOT BE DEFEATED. NOW BE BLESSED AND BE A BLESSING TO SOMEONE.
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