Saturday, December 30, 2006

Good Night

Hi

A friend told me a story today that stuck with me for a long time. She said that she was in love with a man who didn't trust her. She began to tell me a story about how the relationship was very different. One that was not in the ordinary realm of things. The  fact that she had not been as responsive to him as she should have been or wanted to be. The relationship suffered because of that. She was planning to go to therapy because of This blockage that she was having but she felt something else going on and she wanted to ask me what I thought about it. She wanted to make a concerted effort to change the relationship this New Year and wanted advice on what to do. She thought that her mate felt that she must be seeing someone else or at least overly friendly with someone else because she was not responding to him. He called her a whore and made several references that she must be seeing someone else because she was not responding to him. She has two men that she worked with who were considered a threat at work. Both seem to flirt but nothing is going on at all with either of them, but her friend thinks that she must be doing something, after all women are not very upstanding in his book. Both of these men are married and in relationships. She continued to insist that there was noone else but he didn't believe her. He didnt trust her. After all, she wasnt very warm and loving to him. Probably like Mary and Joseph at one time. She finally realized that she was not going to convince him on her own and even if she had therapy he would continue to believe that there must be someone else in the relationship. How could she convince him or should she even try? Was she paranoid that he felt threatened? Would he ever trust her? Was she worth the risk? Was thsi the one to take the plunge? Did he really feel secure with this one? What should she do? What should she do?

Well, I'm no shrink, nor do I like to give advice to any one about their love life, after all, mine is not one to hold up and admire, but I told her to pray and let God give her an answer because the truth should always be the divining rod for every situation. The Truth. How was she to know the truth. Search your heart and if you still feel that you dont know the truth then you are not ready for the relationship. There is not another man in the situation. Then the truth will be the answer. The fact that something is still wrong and the relationship is not where she thinks it should be, maybe the truth is that this is where its suppose to be and she may need to accept that fact. I told her to ask the Lord to search her heart and to guide her to where He wanted her to be. The truth of the matter. What is troubling your heart? Do you think I gave my friend good advice?

Friday, December 29, 2006

Hello

Good afternoon. Today I am working on my communication skills. I want to improve how I respond to others and how I interpret what others say to me. I want to reduce the confusion. Improve the understanding and be content that the message is heard the right way. Sometimes we are watched and blamed for things we did not do. It just happens like that. We were doing the right thing and in the right place. None the less we are blamed for something else going wrong. Staying true to God's plan and to his word is my ultimate goal. Let God's word be the the truth and man's be a lie.

Thursday, December 28, 2006

Grey's Anatonmy

scent-image.jpg

I am watching this right now and I have the opportunity to also use my computer because the girls are not here. Yeah!!!!

Not that I dont love them but sometimes you need a little space. She took the baby with her and I am happy about that. Love the baby but need some time away from him too.

Grey's Anatonmy _ Don't Chase Me Anymore Unless You Are Willing To Catch Me.

What do you think????

This is a story that has a lot of plot lines running through it. Most of them about relationships. I am happy a black female is writing it and I like it but there's a lot of relationships involved in this drama.

Men In Trees is the next drama coming on and let's just see what this is about.

Hello

Today is Thursday. I have had a busy day. Dr's appointment this morning. I went to see Night at the Museum, which I thought was good, even though the critics dont think so. Still trying to get an electriician from Home Depot to confirm a date for installation. I'm sure its because of the holiday. 

I am looking forward to New Years Eve Service. The watch service is always special. They scheduled readers and one asked me to read for them. I know you usually dont have a reader but I'm ready if you do. Usually you dont have a reader. Then in the morning I have to take my daughter and the baby to the airport at 6am. They will be in Boise for a week. That's when the real break begins. 

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Hello

Its already Wednesday. This week is flying by. I need to install (that means have someone else come out and remove and install) a ceiling fan for the kitchen. Wash a ton of clothes, sheets and towels. Grade a ton of papers. Make a couple of lessons before the 8th and then of course, rest and relax.

I dont care what others think. I care what you think. Stay Focused and Determined. Have Faith, Keep the Faith. Its Going to Be All Right.

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Christmas Gift

09 L'EAU PAR KENZO – Kenzo
Flower By KenzoI had been trying to think of something for you for Christmas that would give you a sense of me whenever you wore it or saw it. I thought of a nice scarf and gloves. Some chocolate, since I know you are a chocolate lover. Something that would remind you of me. Then I thought of it. I like a fragrance that I cannot get at any store. I have to order it online. I found it when I was in London in 2004. Its Flower by Kenzo. I really like. So I thought why not get you the male fragrance. You may not like it but I know that you do wear fragrances and at least I know that I have something that is matching. Like matching sweaters or jackets. Matching hats, t-shirts. Something matching that belongs just to you and me.  I hope you like it. I ordered it today and I hope to have it by Saturday. I'll bring it to church on Sunday. So now that gives me a sense of peace. I have found a present that I think you will like.

Good Afternoon

Well, well, well. I finally had a chance to listen to the two sermons today. I was on the floor under the computer so that I could listen with my headphones and not disturb anyone. Needless to say you were on fire. I believe you were speaking from the heart. Deep inside your heart. It touched my heart. Patience, time, commitment and perseverance. Faith, faith, faith. I don't have to understand, just know that it is so. Know that one day, somehow, it will happen. A covenant

Be blessed today. I feel better today. Be blessed and be a blessing to someone special.

Monday, December 25, 2006

Christmas Just Aint Christmas Without the ONe you Love

Christmas just wasnt the sam without my church family. My time has been spent with church family every year and this year I was under the weather. Last year when I came home from the service, our furnace was going out and we smelled a strong odor of smoke, we had to call the fire Dept at 2 in the morning. This year I was with my family and we were all sick. That just wasn't fair. One of my neighbors came over to wish us a merry Christmas. I have not met them all year and they decided to visit on Christmas. Good thing we had some extra cookies made.I am starting to feel better. I had soup today and yesterday. I was feeling better this morning but then after my shower, I made breakfast, that was just a bit too much. My day was very plain. I just wanted to get a message to you before the day was officially over. I heard from two people that the Christmas dinner was on the news I missed it. I tried watching the nine o'clock news on WGN and FOX but I didn't see it. Just figures. Well Good Night and God Bless You.

Sunday, December 24, 2006

Merry Christmas

Well I think I spoke too soon. Last night around midnight I began to get sick. Vomiting and everything else. I was up until 5am. I feel terrible. I thought I was not going to get sick because I had a flu shot but I guess this virus is not immune to the flu shot. It like almost everyone is sick. Anna is better, she's excited and well. Lizzie is well but she's waiting to catch it. My mother and my father are both under the weather. Austin is still battling with it. What a motley crew we are for Christmas. I had some crackers and soup today. I think they will stay down.

Do you have any idea how much I miss fellowshipping together tonight? I haven't missed a Christmas Eve service in many, many years I was pleased to see that it will be on the Internet. I can at least listen, I hope. I will miss the pageant. I will miss you. Merry Christmas. Jesus loves you and so do I.

Saturday, December 23, 2006

Hello

Hello. The flu is running through this house. My brother, my father, the baby, and myself all had flu shots. The rest are having some kind of 24 hr bug. Throwing up and pooping. The baby had some if it though. He's better now. Mom is having her turn at it now. I don't need it or want it.

Tomorrow I will be at church at 8pm. I almost made it today but then plans were changed. I plan to attend on Monday too. I think I will help out at the dinner but I didnt want to obligate and not show up.

How are you doing this week? Has it been crazy for you? Are you geting your rest? Have you been feeling well? I miss you. Be blessed and be a blessing to someone special. Thank you for the toys again, it was very nice.  

Friday, December 22, 2006

Good Morning

Good Morning Lord. Father God. Almighty. I spent three hours on the phone last night with Dell removing a horrible virus. Someone is sending a virus that says your Microsoft windows program is counterfeit, to fix it click this. It looks very authentic. For the past two days we have not had Internet. The computer at school by my desk was having problems too. Yesterday was the party, it was very hectic. Then the kids tell me that my computer is working again. I don't get a chance to even sit down yesterday. At home I have to try and fix this computer. Good thing I brought the service contract last year, I have until March before have to renew. Lord I'm not sure if I am angry, frustrated, or just plain tired.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Hello and Good Night.

Well today couldn't have been more interesting. I was selected to be part of the walk through team. I was both elated and dejected. I wanted to see what was going on in other classes and find out what the board was looking for and I also wanted to retreat to the comfort of my classroom and not be involved in the goings on of the region and just be concerned with my own classroom. I really think we came up with some pertinent and important things for our children. The classes that I went through were the 7th and 8th grades and Science. Our children were well behaved, which was a plus. They at least know how to act for guest. The biggest thing we noticed for the upper grades was the lack of cursive writing. it should be seen through out and it wasn't. When I came last year and I was teaching Writing, My first and foremost thing was that they write in cursive. Most students needed a review and many couldn't read cursive when I wrote it on the board. The listening skills and note taking skills are very poor too. All in all we will improve or do poorly. Right now I am in holiday mode. I said I wasn't going to the Talent Show but I went. I thought I didn't have after school today but I did so since I was at school I decided to attend. The show was so much better than last year. So many of the 7th and 8th grade students were in the show it was nice to see them doing something they enjoyed.Tomorrow is the staff party. I said I wasn't going to that. I hope I can stick to my guns for that. Did I say guns, figure of speech. I'll have to change that. I watched Paula Zhan tonight on CNN. I caught the last half hour. It was on racism and reconciliation. Al Sharpton, and other prominent black and white figures were on. The fact that they are open to discuss this on prime time is important. Until justice is done, injustice will continue to be the call of the day for those in power. I have put this all in one paragraph. Something I always tell my students not to do. I am human. I am tired and this is not being graded. I am going to bed. Good Night. Be Blessed.

Monday, December 18, 2006

Countdown

I am counting down the days until Friday. I hope this week goes by just like a flash. Then the next two weeks go by at a snail's pace. I don't have afterschool this week so I will be done early. Tuesday is the talent show which I will not be attending. Wednesday is the staff party which I will not be attending and Thursday is the classroom parties. After that I know the next day is Friday. Wonderful, Beautiful Friday. Its going to be crazy on that day. Tomorrow is our Area Inspection. I have to get there early, we also have a staff meeting first thing in the morning. Thank you for the toys. I havent seen them but she called me and said she received a generous amount of toys.  Have a blessedly wonderful evening and continue to be a blessing to someone special. 

Sunday, December 17, 2006

Faith Hope Love

Lord thank you for today. I enjoy the felowship of the believers. I believe that we need to praise and worship you together. The fact that just believing in you isnt enough, we have to seek you  daily and desire to be renewed and transformed by the renewing of our minds is important.

Today Lord I was renewed. I know that I am a child of God. I have been given the opportunity to Love you, To Worship You and to Seek your Glory. My heart yearns for a closer relationship. I have to realize that the last close relationship is not the only close relationship that we will have. Each time I draw nearer there is always more for me to seek. When I feel I have a breakthrough, I have to realize that there is more.Always there is more to seek, nmore to desire, more to reach for in my relationship with God.

What about my relationship, my friendship, my covenant with you? We will continue to define and redefine our relationship. Am I reaching for constant attention? Do I need constant gratification? Constant recognition? Am I too needy? Am I too sensetive, too touchy, not understanding the big picture? I know the big picture and if God needs someone else to do it then so be it. I will serve the Lord in whatever capacity I am able to do it. My desire is to please the Lord. My Father, My Almighty, My Lord. My heart is open to the Lord and his wishes. I see myself as an accomplished person. Someone who can do the Lord's will and make it happen. I have the capacity to win. I am a winner. My life is good, and I am able to take God's promises to heart. I believe not just in the fact that I will marry but that I will be an important force in the Lord's kingdom. I will be recognized as someone who spread the word of God to the people and who gave comfort to the elderly, the poor, the prisioner, and the single mothers and widows. I believe that I will make a difference in this world and I'm not afraid to make it happen. I continue to seek God, I know that finding him once doesnt mean that I need not seek him again. I renew my relationship daily with my Lord and Savior. Have a blessed evening and enjoy your day.

Friday, December 15, 2006

My faithfulness to tithing has to be consistent. My time, my treasures and my talent. I think I am donig the best I can do but I know that I can do better. God knows I can do better.

Baby cry , gotta go.

Thursday, December 14, 2006

At Last

At Last

My Love Has Come Along.

My Lonely Days are over. That's an Etta James sont that I like. Its in the movie Plesantville and its also in this new commercial for Beautiful the perfume. I like that song. Its very soulful

My life is blooming and I am going to make sure that my life is good. I look forward to one more week and then two weeks of vacation. Its a well deserved vacation. I have earned every minute of it.

I am just watching the news and I see that the Bush family have taken on the task of fighting Malaria in Africa. Not AIDS, but Malaria. Its a more acceptable disease to fight and the sexual conotations are not there. Good, but still not enough. Work on AIDS, make a difference in the African American community.

I'm going to bed now. Good Night Sleep Tight. Know that you are Loved.

Hello

Today began early and I am hopeful that it will not be too long of a day. The weather is beautiful. I have a minute now to look out the window and its sunny. I noticed rain earlier. I just wanted to say hello and let you know that I was thinking of you today. I have an afterschool program until 4:30 then my day is through here. More drama at home. What if both parents go senile. Or what if one is just a crazy woman, can you still commit her? Of course now she is showing her jealousy about the attention my father is receiving. Lord I dont need this. Crazy at home, crazy at work. I guess I am just born to be with the crazies. Well I have to go to the ladies and then deal with the rest of my day.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Guide Me to Your Truth

Good Afternoon Lord. I am ready to do things your way through and through. Dont grow impatient with me. Make my heart open to what you have to say. Iunderstand that there are short term cost for some long term benefits. My alarm went off this morning and I pressed the snooze button twice. I woke up at 2:30 this morning and didnt go back to sleep until almost 4. I am in training for my journey. You send us out on journeys every day. You equip us with power and authority. I want to grow in the areas of my life that will continue to produce spiritual maturity. I shouldnt yell or have ill feelings toward my students. I must take care to listen and be aware of their feelings. I am thankful that I can worship you Lord and that you continue to strengthen me so that I can bear the real cost, the true cost of dicipleship. My heart longs for you. I know that it will all work out. I can love and be loved. I am willing to let somebody love me before it is too late for me to love. Love is really showing someone that you care about them and want nothing but the best for them. Have a good day. I have to think about your Christmas present this year. Yes, I am getting you a present.

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Good MOrning

Good MOrning Lord. Thank you for waking me up today. I am determined to seek you daily Lord. My desire is to please you. I asked what can I do to reconcile and you said to keep my promise to the journal. He needs it daily. He wants to connect with me and if I would just give love a chance maybe he would be able to connect with me. I just see the transition for here to there taking place in an instant. First I'm single, then I'm married. No hoopla, no fanfare, just us, together. I will keep that in my mind, my heart and my soul. I will believe in that promise. Thank you Lord for loving me and letting me know that I am a good work in your kingdom. Have a blessed day today sweetheart and be a blessing to someone special.

Monday, December 11, 2006

RECONCILATION

 What do I have to do to fix it?  I will let God guide me. My focus has been off. I have to get my priorities straight. God first then you and me. My mind is on my love. Have a good night.

Sunday, December 10, 2006

The Pursuit of God

The Pursuit of God-A.W. Tozer

I wanted this book after you told us about it in bible study. I finally got it today. I plan on reading it tonight. At least starting it. As the deer pants after the water, so my soul pants after you O God. Psalm 42

I wish you wouldn't look away when our eyes meet. Sometimes its important to make a connection. I pray that I am not the cause of discomfort for you. I say that and I know that this situation, if I believe its real, and I do, I realize that it must be uncomfortable for you. Its confusing and uncomfortable for me. I am sincere in my pursuit of God. I want what God wants for me. I know that together we can make a difference. I want you as my husband, my mate, my spouse. I want you to guide me and love me. Keep me on the straight and narrow path to God.

I pray for you daily. I pray that your heart, mind and spirit keep your body balanced and healthy. I know that you are a man of God and God loves you and so do I.

I will make it a point to be a better steward of this journal. I know I have some decisions to make. I have to prioritize my time and place this, which I believe is something God wants me to do right now back on the top of my list. I know that another day is not promised. I try to live this life as if I will do my best today and today is the only day that matters. If God has silenced me, how do I obey his commands to enhance my future husband's chances of getting a new and improved spouse. If I am impeding my future, how do I get out of the way. All of this requires God to step in, mix things up and for me to let go and let it happen. I feel as if I have been sent on a whirlwind ride and I'm still on it. I believe God is working in my life and I have faith that he has not left me, nor has he forsaken me. I need you to need me and I need to need you. I need to let my self need you and trust you, which I do. I just have to keep moving in that direction. Keep moving on.

Reconciliation. This is when couples have a quiet dinner together and make promises and long talks together. This is when we bond. We spend some we time together. We believe in each other and believe that we are going to get through this. I don't even know what this is. I don't understand but I know that it will get better. I believe it will get better. Well, enough of this confusing talk, prepare for your travels tomorrow. I will pray for you tonight, tomorrow morning, afternoon and evening. You have a good heart.

Good Morning

Good MOrning Lord. I am thankful and hopeful that I get things together the way you want me too. Each day I find myself realizing that I must purposefully stride towards your goal for me in my life. I take individual respondisibility for my actions. I  have to move with whatever steps you allow me to move towards you. Baby steps, giant strides or just the knack of standing still. I know that if I want  my promise, I have to go after it wholeheartedly. I seek you  Lord. I seek your promise and your blessings. I pray that I am continuing to seek you daily.

I think the evening went well. I left around 11pm. I found myself searching for you with my eyes. I expected you to look hansome and you did. You circulated very well. I hope everything stayed under control and you were able to get some rest. I know that I must be more cognizant of my duties and my abilities. I plan to get a laptop. I need access to the computer whenever I want. With my Dad in the family room now, I cant go to the computer whenever I want. The month of December is a very spirit filled month and I want to press on towards my goal. If I have to take note cards and speak from there I will. Be blessed today. I'm reading so I have to get there early and you know that's not my forte. I will be there though. I love you.

Friday, December 8, 2006

Good MOrning

Good Morning Lord. I pray everything will be all right for the young boy in my class who was hurt yesterday. I know that your angels are watching and protecting him and his family. Everyday I pray for my school family, my church family, my city, my state and my world. I know that things can happen in the twinkle of an eye. He just walked into the bathroom and slipped on some water. Hurt his back to the point where we had to call 911. I had to call his mother and tell her to come quickly, her baby has been hurt. Lord protect us in our travels and guide us through the day. Dispatch your warring angels to build a hedge of protection around us. Have a blessed day.

Wednesday, December 6, 2006

Good MOrning

Good MOrning Lord. Thank you for waking me up today and starting me on my way. I am blessed and highly favored today. Today I am writing in my journal. I miss it so much in the mornings. I need to schedule my time better in the mornings so that I can write.

I am seeking that secret place with you. That place where I am protected and loved. Lord you hold out your hands to me and ask me to come. Come. Like the bridegroom waiting at the altar for the bride. I come down the aisle. Thank you Lord for wanting me, for needing me.You want to be wanted and needed and loved. I love you, I need you, I want you. God hears my heart. I am pursueing him daily. I cant make it without him. I wount go without him. I have to have him. I'm glad he's a jealous God. He can provide all of my needs, and keep me safe in the secret place. My heart longs for you. I miss you. I need you to need me, to want me to know that I love you.Come Lord come. Come into my heart and into my mind. Want me, need me, rest in my shadow. I'm all you need. I want you to want me. Want me for who I am.

You have given me a love song for my heart. Have a blessed day today and be a blessing to someone special.

Monday, December 4, 2006

Good Night

I listened to Sundays sermon. It was powerful and moving. I took some really great notes but alas, they are gone. this is the edited version. Here I am Lord, I'm ready.

The most important words uttered on Sunday are Now Go and Be a Blessing To Somebody. Establish his kingdom on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Be Blessed tonight and know that I love you.

Good Morning

Good Morning Lord. Thank you for a beautiful morning because I have awaken with my mind on Jesus, my limbs are working and I can talk and move around. Lord I do not take any of my abilities for granted. I understand that if it had not been for your grace and your mercy I wouldn't be here today. Glory to your name Father God.

I waited until 10pm for the opportunity to hear the sermon yesterday, I couldn't listen to it live, and it never appeared. I guess there must have been problems. I'll have to listen to it tonight.  The title seems good, The Power of Vision. I'm excited about listening to it later. May you have a good day today. Stay in God's Mercy, Grace and Loving kindness.

Sunday, December 3, 2006

Good Morning

 

Good Morning Lord.

My joy is complete when I have you  in my heart and in my mind. Today I will not be at church. I have to take my dad to his building and one of the car's is down so it puts me in a precarious situation. Though it doesn't make a difference today with this being unity Sunday I would get back early, my daughter has to work too today. The baby is filled with congestion in the chest, but he is still in good spirits. My ability to rely on the Lord, My Father and My God is increasing everyday. Father God I praise you and know that you watch over me daily. You demand that I continue to serve and use your spiritual gifts to minister to others. I spend my days trying to draw closer to you Lord. You require me to share my instruction in the Lord with others. To contribute to their support.I pray that I not grow weary or faint hearted in doing good. I know that the way to heaven is not just to do good, but to have a heart and mind that seeks to please you daily and to do your will daily. I know this is not easy and I struggle with that daily. Only you God can give me grace and mercy for my actions. I cheerfully and joyfully seek to abandon anything that is not of you in my life. What I continue to seek is YOU FATHER GOD. Everything else is a blessing from my seeking you Lord. If I have lost my blessings from the past, then continue to bless me for my future. Not one day is promised to me so I seek you daily and I take nothing for granted Lord. I desire justice, goodness and the truth. I seek how to care for people the Jesus way. Jesus did not heal all and I seek to walk like Jesus. I know the walk is hard and I am continuing to seek your glory Lord. Together, Father, we can do all things.

Give and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together and running over, shall men give into you bosom. Luke 6:38

Friday, December 1, 2006

World AIDS DAY

Hello

Well, what a day today was. Last night I was really wanting it to snow and snow hard. I wanted lots of snow.

The snow was heavy. I shoveled this morning and I had to clean the car off. It otok me an hour.

I had to go in today. I have been sick so much and I need to go everyday this month. I will take one month at a time. I am feeling much better and its allowing me to do so much more. Progress reports will come out soon and I have to get some grades in my book.

I just wanted to say hello and to try and get a message out today.

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