In Secret

I listened to Rev Wright's Monday night service on TV. He struck a real cord. He talked about the DL. The down low. Keeping things under cover. Encrypted, in code, in hiding. What a conviction. This journal was something I had started just on my own. I didn't start it with the belief that you would find it and then we would communicate through it. My actions in your presence would suggest otherwise, though. When we are together, I am quiet and unassuming. Almost non existent. How to reveal the secret?

My actions indicate I want to keep this a secret. I don't. I inadvertedly have turned this into a secret liason type meeting. I think that's why I kept wanting to stop the journal and bring this into the open. The journal keeps us connected, but it has become the only communication. We need to enhance it. Actual presence is the key. I don't want to hide or have some clandestine relationship that only we know about. Even calling you to wish you well is still keeping it private and secret.I should know how to bring this relationship out into the open. It shouldn't be this difficult for me. You would think when people have relationships in secret that stuff is being done wrong between them. We don't have any of that going on. It's the total opposite. Our secret is not so secret really. What is the secret really? Only that we have been reading and writing in a journal.