A Prayer of Despair

Feeling defeated, without hope, wanting to give up. Despair is a time when darkness seems to have become our closest friend. When we experience a series of losses. Not just one or two, but a series of losses, we seem to feel defeated. We think that we can't get back up again. We can't continue hoping for anything good to happen in our lives. We give up on the dream. On the possibility of someday making it come true.

 Psalm 88:1-5
Oh Lord, the God who saves me, day and night I cry out before you.

May my prayer come before you; turn your ear to my cry.
For my soul is full of trouble and my life draws near the grave.

I am counted among those who go down to the pit; I am like a man without strength. I am set apart with the dead ...

God the thought of despair being the last thing I believe in is very disheartening.  I have to jump to Psalm 91 and remind myself that I have angels before me and around me. I am loved by The Lord Almighty and that You Lord sent your only Son to take on my sins long before I even knew I had sins. You save me from myself long before I knew I needed saving.

Psalm 91:1-7
He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.

I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.

Surely he will save you from the fowler's  snare and from the deadly pestilence.

He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge;

his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.

You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day,

nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday.

A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand,  but it will not come near you.

Father God I wonder when, I wonder if, I seem to have mor doubt that faith. I see myself in the same situation and wonder if this is how its suppose to be or have I missed my chance. Do I stay in this or am I suppose to realize that things have changed. What is going on? What is it that I am suppose to do? Let it happen Lord.

Psalm 90:12
 Teach us to number our days aright that we may gain a heart of wisdom.

Lord don't let everything out of me be such doom and gloom. I pray for peace and happiness. Comfort and love. Let that be a decree on my life, how ever long it may be.