God Protect's His Own

I will begin this with Galatians 5:22-23

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control."

I am going to have to call upon all of those qualities to complete this entry.

My immediate thoughts are "Praise the Lord" a life was saved today. God continues to intervene in our lives even when we are unaware of his intervention. You are a blessing to Saint Sabina and the Catholic Church. I believe God has a wonderful purpose for you and you are fulfilling it daily. You were chosen for that role. God continues to shine through you.

I don't think God is really in the coming together of you and me. If he were this wouldn't be so challenging for me. I would find some reward for my efforts. And if I am not being rewarded then maybe I am barking up the wrong tree so to speak. If God were in it then he knows what I need from a relationship and I havent gotten any of that. No phone calls, no dates, no coffees, no nothing. I'm not saying you are wrong about my having low self esteem and self worth. I struggle with it constantly. But, wouldn't God know that and find a way for me to be successful? Wouldn't he help me in this task? I think so. Some how, some way, and I'm just not seeing that. Maybe I was chosen by God to put back on track with him. Help guide your thoughts back to him and his mission.

I'm trying to find God's will in all of this and I'm having a hard time locating it. I am having a hard time finding the good out of this. I believe I would be talking to the man I say I love and would be talking to me and not think of this as a "push me-Pull me" game. I don't like games and I don't want to go down this road. I was ready to be content minding my own business and keeping the thoughts and desires of my heart right there, in my heart.

When I started the journal I truly think the chaos began. Inuendos in your sermons increased, not that they werent ther before. You talk at me but you never talk to me. All I seem to see are signs of an abusive relationship. Emotional and maybe even physical. I pray that I am wrong. My dress offends you, an old sweater and new boots and I am a whore. Another man offers to take me to lunch and your informants tell you and suddenly I am equated to Eve and the destruction of the whole human race. I know who I told so I know who told yu. But I overlooked that and enjoyed the fact that you were territorial. Another man gives me a hug, done commonly at this church, and you make me fell like I had sex in the middle of the room with everyone watching.

I know that this is not what you were thinking, but I know you were jealous in both instances. I trust God and I will trust HIM to guide me in this relationship. I go to spiritual counseling to help me find the possible cause of whats going on with me, you suggest that I stop and I do. You suggest that its bring up old memories and maybe I might want to fan the flame with an old love again. How thoughtless of you. You have absolutely no confidence in me at all. But then why should you? We don't talk. I believe you expect me to change during one of your 4 hour worship services. While they are inspiring and motivating, You can't fix me. God's going to have to show up on this one because your message to me today was "Look, Whore, You are chosen and I'm not playing anymore games with you. If you wanted to be with me you would, so its over." So I'm going to listen to your words and stop writing for a while and turn to God to guide me because obviously I don't know what the hell I'm doing. I'm beginning a new job and I would like to thank you for your blessing, and I am now going to go to the bible and try to improve my outlook and self esteem. Good Night.

Warning signs seem to be popping up all ove for me. I think God is trying to tell me something. Maybe that's why I can't/won't talk to you comfortably. There's a reason why things are the way they are and instead of looking at what I want to happen I need to look at what is actually happening. Yes let's look at that. Let's look at what is and not what I want it to be. I knew you were upset at the house blessing. I won't be making any entries for the next couple of weeks.

Good Morning

God Bless you this morning. What a beautiful morning. God has given me another chance to get it right. Another chance to do his will. Another chance.

What blessings and grace I have from God. Blessings and Grace.

What a beautiful thing.

I am blessed and I am recieving God's grace.

I have an idea and I can't wait to share it with you.

Blessings and grace.

Thank you for another day to get it right.

What is going on???

There was a pull back from you. It wasn't just me this time. There was hesitation on your part. And I have no IDEA what was going on with Mr. T.

 It has never been anything and never, never will. I don't know why I am defending this but there were some awkward moments. I'll just begin to ignore him like I do others.

Why does this have to be so hard.

All previous do's and don't are off for me. We can talk about the journal. We can't live like there is no journal. Then we aren't being honest to our selves. We have to be in the open with ourselves. Even thought this is "private" between us the contents have to be acknowledged between us. I have to say we have to change the rules, upset the game, make this a new level. I can't  continue with the distance. At least we can acknowledge the togetherness in some aspect of our lives. If its all me, then that's not good. I have too much control in this. I relinquish it.

Good Morning

Good Morning.

I'm up and getting ready to go to my dad's. I need to slow down and check my spelling more.

I'm going to leave soon so I can finish what I started on Tues with him. I look forward to seeing you this afternoon.

Saturday

I didn't know about the house blessing until today. I didn't receive an invitation. I was not told of it until today. When you cancelled the meeting, I made other plans for Saturdyay,  I told my day I would come over. I have been putting him off all week and I just saved Saturday for him. I will try to go early so that I can ge there around 3-30pm. I hope you are still there when I get there.

After the meeting this evening, we went out to dinner and a movie. Nevr again will I see a scary movie. This wasn't even that good. Hid and Seek. Never again will I count 1 one thousand, 2 one thousand, etc.  I don't like scary movies anymore. I used to like them, but not anymore.

This was a very long day.Another date night. Well, have a good night.

 

Good Morning

Hi, Good Morning. What a beautiful morning.

God has given us another chance to get it right.

Today is busy. Inservice in the morning, down to the board, over to dad's, teacher's meeting at 5pm.  We'll see if that all gets done.

I know you were looking forward to tomorrow too, and its a dissappointment for you as well.

As I was reading my bible God directed me to Mark 7. I know you probably feel like those are just silly rituals right now and maybe they are but the people need you  and that's what important. I'm rooted. Have a good day today. Be supportive and know that you are loved.

Good Night

I will miss you on Saturday, but I know that they need you.

I hope you are able to reschedule soon.

Good night I have to get up eary in the am.

Good Morning

 

Good Morning, Good Morning, Good Morning.

Did you sleep well?

Today I have a half hearted busy schedule.

Now I have to finish getting stuff for my hire.

Maybe start taxes.

Cleaners, I have to start dressing like a professional everyday.

Some shopping, looking, little stuff.

All this before work this afternoon/tonight.

I told them I had a full time job now and would need to cut back. I couldnt bring myself to give a resignation. I know I will need to though, they are losing two others at this time and one other is also cutting back. I am just delaying the inevitable. I think I will type it up and just have it for next week. I'm sure after I leave school and then come there for two days I will be pooped.

What's going on with you?

"Never be aftaid to trust an unknown future to an all-knowing God." - Martin Luther

"I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will consel you and watch over you." Psalm 32:8

Red Tape

 

Well, I didn't go downtown, and a good thing I didn't. It would have been a waste.

The principal hadn't staffed the position yet, so I wasn't in the computer. I had called to find out what I needed to bring and a ten item checklist was given to me.

More money requesting transcripts, rush transcripts.

I had a physical in late December so that will suffice, but I have to have the doctor fill it our on their form.

Birth Certificate, passport, driver's license, SSN card, etc.

I have gathered most of that info and I just have to pick up transcripts and fax a copy of the physical form to the doctor's office so they can fax it to them.

Then I'm done.

OK,  well, enough of that process. On to work to try and figure out how to tell them I can't do this anymore.

The Past and The Future

This is just a true indicator of my life with my little Pookey. He came in my life when I was transitioning and stuck by me and protected me. He was tenacious. He would never leave alone. I loved him.

My thoughts for a new dog never went towards another Chihuhua.

This one might be a good candidate for a new puppy.

 

Good Morning

God has seen fit to bless me another day.His mercy and kindness are never ending.

Today, I go down to the board and fill out all the stuff.

I am so blessed. Here it is, January 26, and I have a job. God is really good to me. It amazes me sometimes. He really does watch over me. He's my God.

I saw Imani when I arrived yesterday, she was in the playground area. I'm glad you have a dog and not a cat. I really don't like cats that much. I prefer dogs. I used to have a dog. A Chihauha, named Pookey. I got him when I was in eighth grade. When I went to the Navy, my grandparents took him. He was my sweetie. He made such a racket when anyone would come over or near me. He was a short hair and just the tiniest little thing. I think I will get another dog. We have been talking about that for a long time. No one wants to take on the ultimate responsibility. Our schedules are so varied. I think I will once I am settled in this job thing. Something small, furry and cute.

Ok, I know you have a lot to do today getting ready for our meeting on Saturday, so I will let you go. I work this evening also, I have to figure how to adjust/eliminate my other job. I can't do both. This will definately free up my time on Saturdays and Sundays.

Be blessed and be a blessing to someone today.

"Blessed are they whose ways are blameless, who walk according to the law of the Lord." Psalm 119:1

I was so ready to have a job. I am at my dad's now. I will be at bible study tonight. I guess I will have something to write for my 2005 blessings. I start on Monday. I have to runaround  for the next three days getting stuff done.

I just thank God for blessing me. I was beginning to wonder.

I Got A Job

They offered me the job. I accepted. I got a job. I got a job.

Good Morning

Good Morning, what a blessed day it is today.

I have the morning at my school. I have to teach so they can see my style and make a final decision. I'm excited.

I look forward to seeing you this evening.

Take care and may God bless every endevour you have today. God knows what you need before you even ask.

Hi, Good Afternoon

No subbing today.

I have a class this afternoon and I have been trying to read this book and I just can't seem to stick with it.

OK I really do need to stick with it though, I guess I just wanted to say hi, HI.

Good Morning

Good Morning.

I'm stepping out on faith today. I walk by faith and not by sight.

I am believing God for everything in my life. I am trusting God.

Good Evening

What a blessed day.

It was so good to fellowship with the believers today.

God truly showed up today.

My eyes were opened again today.

Lord, I am never going to ignore him, or turn away from him again.

When he came down that aisle, I turned as he got closer. I saw him shift, and he was disappointed, that I didn't recognize him, didn't just speak to him. What an idiot I was. I had always thought it was him not recognizing me. I thought he had to say something to me, but that's wrong. My goal now is that when I see him I will make sure I have acknowledged him and greeted him warmly. Please forgive me for my ignorance. I don't ever want to treat him like "the other woman". I never want him to feel like I am treating him like that. I want to greet him warmly, say good morning,welcome him to give his offering with me, together. I want to smile when I pass him, hug him for ten seconds and truly start letting him know that I do want him. I vow now to always acknowledge him when I see him and if possible to give him the 10-second (1-1000 count) hug. I want to show that he is my man and I choose him. I want to make a conscious choice to stay together for the rest of our lives and I will openly display attraction and the fact that I am in love with him. This isnt a secret to be treated like an affair, its something to be shouted from the mountain tops. God is teaching me everyday how to truly love a man and be love by a man. Its all new to me. Its like I have never been loved before and I have to learn everything from scratch, from the beginning. I want to learn and I want to get it right, with you.

God's Morning

 

"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men." - Colossians 3:23

Bible Study Notes

January 18, 2005

"Who and What is the Church?"

Coming to a time of NOW.

Rekindle the fire of who we are.

We have been called to greatness.

Building the infrastructure

1 Timothy 3:14-15

Church means a body or a called out people. Called out or set apart. CHOSEN. A group of believers, brought together by a spirit, entrusted by a shepard or pastor, to live/grow in the knowledge of the things of GOD and live out vision with other imperfect people.

It's about a group of believers.

Not everybody that comes to church is a believer.

Church is a group of believers brought together by the Holy Spirit.

We need to know we are here because the Holy Spirit has called us to be where we are.

We are called by the Holy Spirit.

We are called by the HOLY SPIRIT.

We are not here by chance.

We must operate in our calling.

To grow in the knowledge of the things of GOD.

The reason is so we won't be ignorant to the porpose and things of the devil (to kill, steal, and destroy).

We should grow in the things of GOD yearly.

Knowledge is real, if it promotes activity. Put it to use.

Real knowledge moves to our ability to be free and free others.

Be blessed and be a blessing to someone else.

When we receive Jesus we obligate ourselves.

There are commitments we have, obligations and responsibilities.

We must grow up and operate in Christ.

The grown up Christ.

See me as who I am and not who you want me to be.

We have to step into our ministry.

The Mission and Vision for him.

Amos 5:18-24

"For a Corporate Vision"

We are no longer a Christ like church when we become more of a "ME-ism"

GOD is the organizer and owner of church.

The church is the pillar and foundation

John 17:15-18

Sanctify them by the truth, your word is the truth.

The church must be the place where the truth is upheld.

Philippians 2:14-16

We are called to be a light, Christ owns that light.

Don't be confused with real light, sun light, and artificial light.

The End

Those are my notes from bible study. I am trying to give this my heart to whatever extent I can. I want you to know what I think about what you have said and I want to know if I got it. Did I understand you correctly? Are we on the same page and if not, let's get on the same page. I believe its worth it to get it right.

Good Night

 

What a day. I spent the whole day inside. I didn't leave the house. It just snowed, and snowed, and snowed.

I'm coming to church tomorrow no matter what. I will definitely leave early though. What the roads will be like I just don't know. We are still having our ACT class tomorrow under the premise that the snow will have stopped and the roads will be cleared. We'll see.

Obligations, commitments, responsibilities, and expectations. People depend on us.

My notes from bible study have me thinking.

See me for who I am and not who you want me to be. We have to step into our ministry. Establish a Corporate Vision.. Less of the me. Mor of a Christ like church where God is the organizer and owner of the church.

Making a conscious choice to stay together for the rest of my life is my choice. Conciously acting on that choice. Not being confused about the choice.

That was my own including into the message. I am choosing deliberately and consciously.

I think the commitments, obligations and responsibilities to others that depend on us is major.

Well, enough of that, off to bed. Sleep well, take care and of course, Be Blessed and Be a Blessing to someone.

Good Morning

 

Oh what a beautiful morning, Oh what a beautiful day.

The center is not open today due to snow. Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.

"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."

1 Corinthians 13:13

I didn't like the words judgemental and self-righteous. I felt they were harsh and I didn't want to let another day go by without apologizing for the use of those words. My spirit directed me to Acts 6:8 - 7:60. Stephen is a man of wisdom and is full of the holy spirit. He received dissent for the Jews and they "could not stand up against his wisdom or the Spirit by whom he spoke."  I believe that you speak the truth and when you stand for that, there are those who try to stand up against you for it. Stephen begins to give them the history of their people since Abraham, the facts and the testimony of the events that happened in the past and in the present. He tells them they are stiff necked and have uncircumcised hearts and ears. The resist the Holy Spirit. Knowing his fate with these people he asks "Was there ever a prophet your fathers did not persecute?"

You, my friend are a prophet, and the people, no matter what, need to hear your voice. They will listen to you, they will hear you, some will obey you.

I don't like the ending of Stephen but I understand that, like Jesus, if we are to truly walk like him and be willing to speak the truth, we have to be ready for real persuction and death. We all have a purpose and if we attempt to please God in our lifetime we have to know that whether we go down that road or not we will still die one day.

I don't like this talk, it seems like death has been around me lately. You have funerals all the time. How does it affect you? Have you become numb or do you speculate on your own immortality occasionally?

Ok, today, I prepare for my teaching experience on Tuesday, to show them what I can do. I prepare for class on Monday by reading The Passionate Teacher, and maybe I might get in my weekly movie. I havent decided what I'll see yet.

Take Care and be Blessed and be a Blessing to someone.

Another Day

                 

...Rekindle the fire of who we are. We have been called to greatness. Let's build the infrastructure. Church means a body or a called out people. Called out or set apart. Chosen. A group of believers brought together by a spirit entrusted by a shepard or pastor...(Bible Study, Pastor, 1/18/05)

Remember who we are and what it is that we need to continue to do. The battle is sometimes the toughest. The foe is often times seen as the enemy we can change. Sometimes that enemy is not changed. Sometimes their hearts have been hardened and ther is nothing we can do but move forward. Our lives become intertwined with that foe until we begin to humiliate each other. We bite down like a pitbull defying the other to let go first. We destroy relationships in the process and lose sight of the vision.

I am no superwoman, I don't have a woman's cause to fight, my only war is conquering your heart.

I am not an obsessed, possessed, try to please everybody woman, all I really want to do is occupy myself with you.

I don't need a lot of outside interests and classes to be happy, I just need your love.

I'm needy needy, moody and infantile when I'm really impatient, frustrated and lonely (and still probably needy, moody and infantile).

I think you think I get mad easily, I'm overly sensitive, and I'm immature. I'm not all of that at the same time, every day.

I think you want me to do, the one thing in your mind, that will cement in your mind and heart, that I am ready and you are ready, and I don't know what that one thing is.

I think you are hiding your gift/talent that was given to you and God wants more. My spirit tells me that you need me to be with you to do this, and I don't even know what it is you need to do.  I might not know all of the foibles and levels butI am willing to face them.

I think you think I am some icon queen because of the pictures, I'm not. I don't have one in my house. I think sometimes you can be judgemental and self righteous but that's necessary in your line of work. I think ultimately that you care/love me and that maybe you believe that I care/love you.

I look forward to being your housewife, making you breakfast, doing your laundry and sitting on the bench rooting my husband on in whatever endeavour he decides to to preach. His role is a major character builder in my life and whether we have sixty minutes alone or the rest of our life I will treasure it and look forward to it.

My spirit seems to need to get this out to you and I hope you receive it in the right way.  I'm not psychic or trying to predict anything this just what God had put on my heart and its that your talent is being buried. You need to work for him now and to go to the places he needs you to go (where obviously you are refusing to go) you need me. And I don't say that to be arrogant or anything else, this is what God has put in my heart. I began this long letter and I was just going to keep it and not say anything else about it but no, I had to say something. I have said it so there.

Its like, the bible verse where they are given the talents and one does nothing and its taken away, another does a little and it grows and the third does a lot and it grows. You must be at a point where you need to grow about something.

                          

Joy

                         

A Joyful heart is the normal result of a heart burning with love. Joy must be one of the pivots of our life. It is the token of a generous personality. Sometimes it is also a mantle that clothes a life of sacrifice and self giving. - Mother Teresa

CLIII

Cupid laid by his brand, and fell asleep.

A maid of Dian's this advantage found,

And his love-kindling fire did quickly steep

In a cold valley-fountain of that ground;

Which borrow'd from this holy fire of Love

A dateless lively heat, still to endure,

And grew a seething hath, which yet men prove

Against strange maladies a sovereign cure.

But at my mistress' eye Love's brand new-fired,

The boy for trial needs would touch my breast;

I, sick withal, the help of bath desired,

And thither hied, a sad distemper'd guest,

But found no cure: the bath for my help lies

Where Cupid got new fire-my mistress' eyes. - William Shakespeare

 

Good Morning and Blessings to YOU. I hope you have a wonderful day, as I plan to do just that.

 

Good Evening

God knows what I need and I am sticking with him until then. I have a whole letter that I wrote today while I was in high school. I was with my handicapped students today so I had to go to high school economics, language skills and Spanish 2. My students are all in wheel chairs and have CP. They need someone to write for them and help them get through their high school years. I have been with these children on and off for four years. So during my time in these classes when the teachers are lecturing, I read or write. Today I wrote. I wrote about what I think you think about me. What I think you think in general and what I think. What am I going to do with this letter. Keep it.

I'm getting ready for my interview tomorrow. I need a job and I hope that this is the one. I don't want to continue with this routine for too long.

Have a good night. Take Care.

Good Morning

 

What a grumpy girl I was. When I'm tired, it shows.

I am subbing today and working this evening.

I am feeling loved. I don't want to not try. I am open to this life. I know God doesn't tell us what he has in store, but I am not shying away from anything he brings me to. I am, where I am suppose to be, at this time, at this place because God has me here. I am walking down this path with my eyes open.

I know God will walk with me on this journey even though he won't let me know where we are going, if I just keep holding on, we will make it, together. That, I believe, and I stand firm in that faith, together, we will make it.

OK I have to get ready now.

Be blessed and have a truly blessed day, be inspiring to someone and continue to speak the truth. Let your heart guide you today.

The Truth

We keep dancing around the truth.

What is it that I'm missing.

Today was a long day. I have a headache right now and I'm sure its because I hadn't eaten since noon.

I keep getting so much junk mail related to my entries. If I mention something I suddenly begin to receive emails relating to that. If you are trying to IM me or send me stuff about refinancing, free gifts, home remodeling, furnishings etc, I am not walking down that path. I generally will delete them all and I block all IM's. I feel like anyone who is trying to reach me is not doing it this way. Yet here I am reaching you this way. Go figure.

My appointment for tomorrow has been cancelled until Friday morning;.

I hope that I am doing the right thing. I dont like discussing specific personal things here. I feel like too many people are here. I don't have any privacy.

Good Morning

Good Morning.

I have a sub assignment today and Friday.

Thurs I have an appointment at my possible school.

Thank you so much for getting to the truth.

Keep the truthgoing, that's the only way we can survive.

For a while I felt like I was talking to myself only.

There are so many things to respond to but ultimately I think that since I have made the conscious choice to make this the ending and beginning for me, every thing else is a piece of cake. I didnt find anything for me to be upset about. I found things to ponder about. I have to get the tape.

OK so, be blessed and truly comtinue to be a blessing to someone. I like that. God Bless. I have to go to work now. More to come much later becaues after school, then my other job. This will be the first day in a long time I have done both. This will probably make me real tired of working quickly.

Good Morning

         

Good Morning, Good Morning

My Prayer to you this day comes from Paul the apostle:

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 14:13

Hope, is my stone for today. Five smooth stones.

All blessing and honor to all mighty God, today, and forever. Trust in him.

As I prepare for Bible Study

Matthew 16:18 - "And I tell you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of  Hades will not overcome it."

I look forward to building my consciousness with you.

OK, today's schedule is to find my references, so I will have them for Thurs. Go fill up the tank for my trip into the city. Think about/actually get on my treadmill. Think about/actually go to Women's Workout World. Prepare for bible study tonight.

My agenda is full. How's your agenda? Have you done something good today? Have you influenced the life of a young person? I know you have, and if you haven't , the day is still young, go and influence someone to do the right thing today.

Good Night

Everything went well with the presentation.

I continue to have hope for my collegues.

It was interesting that there was a presentation from the school also.

My reflections, thoughts and perceptions.

My Trinity.

My Life.

My Hope.

I continue to be very patient.

Good Night.

Hope

 

Thank you Lord for another day to hope in, another day to believe in and another day to love. Thank You Lord. Thank Your for My Love, My Heart.

Good Afternoon

 

           

I hope your morning went well and if it didn't make your afternoon better.

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

Hope springs eternal. I have been washing clothes and preparing for class tonight. I woke up at five this morning. Took some clothes out of the dryer, folded them, and then went back to bed. I thought about sending a message then but my brother was in the family room so I just waited until he went to bed. He works nights so he's up until 7 or 8 am. Sometimes I will send a message with him around sometimes I won't. I like some privacy.

I've decided to do the eulogy of the little girls killed in the church blast in Birmingham for my class. Since we have to give and receive critical commentary I think that is appropriate. We are to be reflective of what's going on in our lives and who we are.

Yesterday was a good day, from the songs to the poster to you just being there. All things work together...

I have to finish a summary then head of to school. Enjoy your day, wrap up and be blessed.Continue to be a blessing everyone you meet.

                              

Good Evening

I am joyful. I feel loved. Today was a good day. I took everything to heart, I felt it was all to be directed at me and I embraced them all. I also told you my school. I think you were pleased. I have an interview with the principal on Thurs.

I wish I could be there tonight, I didnt get off work until 6pm though. I would be late, be in the back and wouldnt see you.

I'm looking forward to Tuesday.

I think part of my discontent lately has been my need not to seem vulnerable. Vulnerablilty requires that I open up my heart to ridicule, critique, judgment and indifference.I do and don't want to do this. I do because it gives us intimacy, a closeness, a secret. I don't because it makes me vulnerable to hurt. But without that, I don't get the love I need. HMMM. Lots to think about.

Blame this conversation on my presentation. The Courage to Teach by Parker Palmer. That has been my readings for the past week. Thats what my group is presenting tomorrow. My sections are the heart. The heart of a teacher.

What did you talk about tonight? Right about now you are there doing what you do best, inspiring people. Thank you for being you. I felt loved today. I love you.

Wrap up, make sure you have a scarf around your neck, wear your gloves and take care of yourself. Talk to you in the morning.

Good Morning

Good Morning, we are here another day. Today is my fathers birthday.

I was feeling a little doubtful lately. It has passed.  I was directed to John 10. The Shepard knows his sheep. They hear his voice.  Lots to think about.

I have to get ready. I have to drop my daughter off at work before church so we have to get out of here on time. Be blessed.

Good Evening

I'm in for the evening. Its so cold outside. Hawaii would be a nice place right about now.

I  wonder what to talk to you about. What was your day like? What did you do today? What are you doing tonight? I wonder.

Well not much here. I will probably have some hot chocolate, watch a movie and get ready for church. I plan to be early

I guess I'm a little sad, no particular reason. Must be the weather. I don't like it when its really really cold.

I look forward to seeing you tomorrow.

Good Morning and Thank You

Good Morning, Thank You for waking me up this morning God. Thank You.

As cold as it is I am here to feel the cold and for that I have to say thank you.

Thanky you  for last night. It was a chance to hear great performers from our pulpit. We are bleesed to have you as our pastor. You provide us with such great forms of enrichment. Thank you. I know you must have had a busy day, and now you are looking forward to another busy weekend. Pace your self and remember what's important. Honor him, remember him and act like him.

I have to work today, of course, then go to my dad's. Still trying to get in all of my readings for class on monday. We have class monday. It's not a holiday. Since I have to present a presentation with my group I am going to give a short MLK speech. I cant let business go on as normal. Especially since I;m the only Black in the class.

I have to get  ready for work. I'm trying to get in the habit of getting up earlier thatn necessa ry so that I can place an entry in the morning. Have a blessed day.

I'm Back

The school was absolutely beautiful. I kept asking God to guide me and let me know if this is the one for me. I continued to say to myself that I walk by faith and not by sight. Walking through the corridor ther was a bulletin board that mentioned faith. I knew this was the one for me. I had been worried about displaying faith and God in the public schools knowing that there really wasnt much of that in most schools. But this school seems to embrace faith values. I was impressed. The school is new, well equipped and well lit. I didnt want some old, dark, broke down school with no resources. This is my school. I meet with the principal on Thurs at 1pm. I hope you are pleased with this school and you will pray for me.

I listen to your tapes while I am in the car. I put on a bible study tape from Jan 27, 2004 to listen to going in and coming back. I think I will do that most of the time now. I need to hear you. I need to have you interact with my senses;  hearing, seeing, tasting, touching, and smelling. I need to reafirm to my self that you are the one for me and I am the one for you. I will commit to this daily. I listen as if you are only talking to me. Only responding to me. Me alone.

I feel good about the school eventhough its in a bad neighborhood. The neighborhood is going through regentrification, basically the white people are moving back in. Currently though its all low income minority.

Well, I have homework, I have a presentation on monday, and I have a date tonight so see you later.

Good Morning

I'm getting ready for my school visit. I have my directions and I am prepared.

Harmony

"The secret of harmony in a family is each of the members wanting God's will fro the others instead of having their own way."  -Evelyn Christenson

"Finally, all of you, live in harmny with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble." 1Peter 3:8

I am excited about the possibility of getting a job, but if this doesnt happen I know that there are other possibilities.

I'm excited about seeing you this evening too. This is the start of a very good day. I have mapquested the address so that I dont get lost. Have my tea and I am ready to roll. Take Care, think positive thoughts and have a blessed day. I know you will be busy but just remember that I love you.

Good Evening

 

Hi, I miss not talking to you earlier. I'm so use to sending you something in the morning. What am I going to do when I get a job. I have school visit tomorrow with one of the contacts from the job fair. It sounds promising. I'm looking forward to it.

I continue to thank God for everything. Every day, every way. If it had not been for God on my side...I am giving it my all tomorrow and hope for the best.

I have to be there early, I am very excited about the possibility of a job. I also will see you tomorrow.

Hello

Internet was out for most of the day. Now its back and I have to go to work. Go figure. I will put in a longer entry when I get home. Just want to let you know I am thinking of you. Take Care.

Success

                    

Well, I'm done.

I went to the job fair in my nice new interview suit, with my freshly printed resumes and my newly acquired credentials and I think it went well. I left pleased.

Of course none of the schools on the list I had were at the fair. Not even one. I gave my resume to four different schools whose principals seemed very interested. One I am hoping for, its near Cabrini Green,  two I wouldnt mind working there, and one I just happen to be standing by their table and started talking to them. They only have a half time position and I told them I am looking for full time.

I will continue my search, of course. I still have some freshly printed resumes. I have to work this evening. I think I will do some reading before going in.

How was your day today? Did you accomplish much? Were you successful in your endeavours today? I'm sure you have lots on your agenda, especially for this Friday and Sunday. Ohh, this Friday is date night and again we will be in the same place. Wow, that's interesting. So I hear you are blessed with an abundance of beds. I just got my bed six years ago, when we moved in this house. Queen size, pillow top, extra firm. The thought of a new bed is intriguing.

Ok, well forty five minutes before departure. Be blessed and be a blessing to someone today. 

 

                           

Good Morning my love. What a beautiful morning. I love it, I love it, I love it. Today is the day I will get a job. Yeah. Yes today I will get a job, or at least someone will be interested in hiring me. I  will leave early enough to not be late due to the traffic moving so slow.

I'm getting ready to go to the CPS job fair. I have my list of schools and my freshly printed out resumes on really good resume paper that I bought yesterday in Champaign. I dropped my baby off yesterday. Back to school where she can try to get an education even though she still has racial obstacles.

OK, now I am a professional woman, qualified to have any job I want and I get to decide who hires me. Good positive mental attitude, breakfast in my tummy and hot tea for the ride in. I'm ready. As always, I will be thinking of you.

          

Patience in 2005, 2006, 2007, etc

                 

2005: The Year of Discipline and Extravagant Blessings

"Cast not away therefore your confidence, which hath great recompense of reward. For ye have need of patience, that, after ye have done the will of  God, ye might receive the promise." (Hebrews 10:35,36)

Faith opens the door to God's promise for you; and patience keeps it open until that promise is fulfilled. (Kenneth Copeland)

"I have learned, in whatever state I amm therewith to be content. (Hebrews 4:11)

                                

Good Afternoon

                   

"Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart."

 Psalm 37:4

I hope your morning went well. I hope your travels were safe and uneventful. What was suppose to happen happened and you are now home safe.

Today I have class so I am finishing up  my homework and reading and I am also putting away my Christmas trees and decorations.

Tomorrow we will leave to take Lizzie back to Champaign. She slept most of the time she was home.

I believe all things are possible. The desires of my heart are known to God. He knows what I want and what I need. My steps are ordered in his purpose.

Honesty

Reflections of honesty.

Creating within me a true reflection of my honest self. What I am and what I feel I am. My honest reflectinos of my life and the things that matter to me.

I hope you had a good day. I hope your travels went well and weren't too tiring. You are well loved and well respected. Keep up the good work.

I'm thinking about applying for a scholarship for a Ph.D.

It will give me something to do. I have to turn in my application by February. They need more minority teachers in higher education.

Take Care my love and I will talk to you tomorrow.

Saturday

 

          

 

I couldn/t let another minute go by without saying something in my journal. I missed you on Saturday. I worked in the morning and then went to see Ray and have dinner n the city with one of the SOW sisters. I didnt get home till 8 or 9 and I went straight to bed since someone was on the computer. I hope you day was productive. I understand the funeral was Saturday. You can be such a comfort to people. Your compassion is evident.

I hope your have a blessed day and safe travels my love.

I hear you are going to speak at the communications meeting on the 29th. I'm taking of work for that. I look forward to hearing what you have to say.

Well now I can go back to bed and rest, I have communicated with you. Its become a necessary part of my day. When I don't put an entry in it doesn't seem right. Its like any relationship, you have to nurture it daily or it will go by the wayside.

Well, I guess I won't see you until Friday Be blessed and be a blessing to someone.

Good Night

I don't suppose I will see you until next week.

I wanted to get back home and in bed before 10pm. I have succeeded.

I have to work tomorrow and Sunday. No more Sundays off. Holidays are over.

I look forward to saying good morning and good night to you. I like to think that you like reading them. I like to send them. Good night my love and be blessed. Sleep well, and have a restful night.

 

Date Night

 

Hello,

Today was very nice. I saw a lot of people I haven't seen since the summer. This was my first time back with this school since the summer.

So, date night 2005. I can imagine some candlelight, soft music and a warm cozy room. Or maybe a movie and dinner. Maybe just talking through the night. Maybe dancing and dinner. The possibilities are endless.

The one thing that matters is that two components are constant, you and me.

Whatever we do and where ever we do it, as long as we do it together, that's all that matters, so date night is whatever we want it to be.

Good Morning My Love

 

"She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness." Proverbs 31:27

Good Morning, Yes it is a good morning. I have a sub assignment today. Yeah. I need to leave in less than an hour. I also have a white elephant party to go to toninght at my director's house.  Of course the whole family will attend with me.

You would have thought yesterday was uneventful for me but it wasn't. I locked my keys in the car when I came back from the store and didn't notice until it was time to go to work. My second set was lost and I never replaced it. Now I need to replace it. My brother got the door open and all is well now.

Well this being the first friday of the new year I will have to think of something special for date night.

Have a blessed day today and be a blessing to someone. Take Care  in all that you do today.

 

Good Morning My Love

Good Morning, Good morning, good morning

We have another day to get it right. To bless the Lord, and to worship him. To give Him the glory in all that we do today.

Today I am finally going to pay DuPage County for the ticket. I have put it off long enough. When I come back then I'mm going to start dinner.

I have to work this afternoon and then start my homework for class when I get home. That pretty much is my agenda for today. Now for your agenda, you go out into the world and make things right. Do some good today. Command somebody to do something right. Take Care my love.